jokes about teenage drivers
~Italian proverb Can you make them laugh? Officer: Don't have one? The cop then asked him, "Then why can I smell wine?" 23. The trick is not to form an emotional bond. Shocked! Why was the taxi driver fired? No, thank you. Mom: That's very nice, sweetie! The Air Force guy thinks for a moment and says, "You know, you're absolutely right! How do you know that the driver driving toward you is a physicist? 5. 46 Jokes for Teens I crashed into McDonald's Because The sign said drive thru! Now Im an angsty adult. Hi bud! ~Judith Martin, "Adolescence," Miss Manners' Guide for the Turn-of-the-Millennium, 1989, missmanners.com Did you hear about the guy who invented the knock-knock joke? Because they keep breaking out. Can you make them laugh? Why do rappers need umbrellas? Get a second opinion from someone such as a teen who is pretty savvy regarding jokes and riddles. A gummy bear. Why cant you give Elsa a balloon? What does a school and a plant have in common? What was one toilet told by another? The Army guy replies, "You're damn right!" The Air Force guy twists the cap back on the bottle and says, "Nahh, I think I'll wait for the cops to come. ~Henny Youngman, c.1960s Because of the fans, 101. She couldn't find her glasses. This isn't always the case, however. Why did theboyrun around his bed? Don't drag out the punch line, attempt to out laugh or out shout these young people, or stumble over your words. I gave up my seat to a blind person in the bus. Because pepper water makes them sneeze! "At 50 cents a call, I've been making $38 a week!" Comments More Jokes Ouch! It was framed, 16. What book wont teachers give you credit for reading? Knock knock. No. What do you call a muddy motorcycle A dirt bike My wife left me after college Because I got a bachelors degree A food fighter. ~Tommy Lasorda, unverified Name that thing that stays in the corner but travels the world? Pupil, 30. He won the no-bell prize. Teenage Driver on Jan 22, 2021 Published in Jokes Subscribe I decided to stop worrying about my teenage son's driving and take advantage of it. 98. What did one hat say to the other? 7. Fortunately, it was just a phase though. That way, when you criticize them, youll be a mile away, and youll have their shoes. Did you hear about the kidnapping at school? Why do cows wear bells around their necks . Swear at everybody on the road. What did baby corn ask mumma corn? What can you catch but not throw? Why are frogs always so happy? Explore our collection of motivational and famous quotes by authors you know and love. High school pizza, 80. Ba-na, na, na, nana! In the good old days, when a teen-ager went into the garage, he came out with a lawnmower. Why is the obtuse angle sad? All rights reserved. It takes too many knights. Reader's Digest Editors Updated: Jul. While you are new to driving, you have to go through many hilariously dangerous situations. Just by seeing the phone bill. It was discovered in 1773. A boy responds, Thank God I was born after 1773! What did the punching bag say to the boxer? What do you call a fly without wings? *Traffic is always heavy in both directions. If they don't, they'll be lost at C. 45. Knowing that it is just half the worm and half the apple, 50. How can you find Will Smith in the snow? What would you call a belt with a watch on it? Hit me one more time., 49. What is the most loved subject of a runner? Good news: After the wreck, your Audi is finally an innie. I am having an out-of-money experience. Tyrannosaurus wrecks. Big hands. How do basketball players always stay cool? Server responsed at: 03/01/2023 9:59 p.m. All texts are contributed by our excellent writers. It was not peeling well. What kind of water cannot freeze? What do a coder and a plant have in common? If a cars chasing you, youll definitely get tired. Jump! She said no on both occasions. Why are pimples the worst prisoners? Nothing, they texted. "I'll bet you're back there to get a change of scenery after . Boys: We are the best because God created us first and created girls last. Never lend your car to anyone to whom you have given birth. Student: Will you punish me for something I have not done? I thought I'd tell you a brilliant time-travel joke. You know Samson had long hair, Moses had long hair, Noah had long hair, and even Jesus had long hair." Dad jokes are excellent for all circumstances because there will be some reaction, it may be a groan, chuckle, or vomit. The husband replies, "He says he knows you. 18. The officer is quite stunned. Knock knock. What do you get when you cross an elephant and a potato? One day, bob picks up a hitchhiking priest. How did the hipster burn his mouth? Students-dying, 73. Jokes can light up any situation and act as great conversation starters. "The data-driven . Why does Humpty Dumpty love autumn? What is the favorite nation of the teacher? Pearis. Whats the difference between ignorance and apathy? Between the Disney movies about talking vehicles and how much time they spend in their car seat, its no wonder your tike is obsessed. Why did the teacher send the kid to detention? How do all the oceans say hello to each other? 79. Police advise citizens to look out for a group of hardened criminals. The woman replies, "No. What did Jay-Z call his girlfriend before getting married? A gummy bear! ~20,000 Quips & Quotes, Evan Esar, 1968 Why do all judges get As in English class? Within a few seconds, they were in a fistfight. 12. What did the nose say to the finger? What do you call a bear with no teeth? He swore he did his homework. Here are some of the best knock-knock jokes that will help you share a hearty laugh with teenagers. Q: Who has the right of way when four cars approach a four-way stop at the same time? Officer 2: One of my officers claims that you do not have a driving license. I wanted to buy a camouflage outfit, but I couldn't find any. If you do, the joke will then be on you! To sing, Hello from the other side!. What kind of tree fits into your hand? Be sure you read each of the jokes and riddles you think you may use thoroughly. Ugh!" The woman goes to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. Yup. How do you find Will Smith in the snow? Between the ages of twelve and seventeen, for example, a parent ages as much as twenty years. What do you call an alligator in a vest? Where does fruit go on vacation? So the Air Force guy pops open his trunk and finds a full, unopened bottle of Jack Daniels. Feyonc. I dont know, and I dont care. My high school bully still takes my lunch money. ", A woman and a man are involved in a car accident; it's a bad one. Hot water. Here are the best funny jokes for teens, clean jokes for teens and overall stupid but good jokes. Whats the difference between roast beef and pea soup? 44. Being a teenager isnt easy. Why cant a T-rex clap their hands? Theres no menu, we just give you what you deserve. Buzzzzcuts! To say "hello from the other side.". Older Woman: Is there a problem, Officer? Who delivers presents to baby sharks at Christmas? I think my algebra teacher is a pirate. Older Woman: Lost it, 4 years ago for drunk driving. 74. Thats why only the best jokes will make them laugh out loud. What didJay-Z call Queen Bey before they tied the knot? It was riveting. Go over there and tell him to use a sponge instead.". Where do the fruits go on vacation? No need to be sorry. It was a boxer. The blonde driving looks at her friend in the passenger seat and asks her to see if her blinker is working. He held his character because hes a professional. Where do the fruits go on vacation? Bob Nickman, Strobe Headlines: What does the worlds top dentist get? You don't want to get caught in front of a group of teens trying to be funny while inadvertently saying inappropriate jokes and riddles. Yah. How do you drown a hipster? Then she hands the bottle to the man, The man nods his head in agreement, opens it and drinks half the bottle and then hands it back to the woman. Here are some funny jokes for teenagers that will tickle their funny bones. For new drivers, it's better to slow down. That doesnt sound so bad. Were any famous men and women born on your birthday? Their voices are a little too horse. Why did the math book look so sad? What did the punching bag say to the boxer? Within minutes 5 police cars circle the car. Nope. What kind of key can never unlock a door? What animal needs to wear a wig? 5. Tropical depression, 86. The women looks at her husband and asked, "What did he say?" How do you make a tissue dance? Teens like to laugh. Have you heard the one about the skunk? Something that must be avoided while driving. What did one toilet say to the other? At the end of the sentence, 29. You can even use them to impress boys or girls youre crushing on! What does the punching bag tell the boxer? He looks quite puzzled. ~Philip Guedalla, as quoted in The Reader's Digest, 1936 17. 6. 22 Quotes for New Drivers 1 Make sure you don't get that compliment. Adolescence is a period of rapid changes. It was a soft drink. Those who do not enjoy fast food. Officer2: One of my officers told me that you have stolen this car and murdered the owner. Because they cannot even. 41. last saved 2022 Sep 18 Why do kangaroo moms not like rain? You used to be able to drive at night without traffic in CA. Are you aware of the kidnapping that happened at school? In fact, some places have little exit ramps where you can pull over and make a car payment. 50 Funny Cartoons That Prove Life Is Funnier Than Any Stand-Up Routine. What do you call a pig that knows karate? Best Jokes For Teens Giphy What kind of fighter never uses his fist, but his weapons are delicious? Try some from the collection below! 76. Our collection of cartoons about teenage drivers will have you nodding your head in agreement and laughing out loud. Go over there and tell him to use a sponge instead.. For MomJunction, she covers literature and information/ facts articles for kids. Those rates skyrocket for teenage drivers to 9.2 deaths per 100 million miles for males 16 to 19 years old and 5.3 deaths for female of the same age. Why was the name Dark Age given to a particular period? Accidents hurt safety doesn't. Why couldnt the pony sing in the choir? Different people take different time period to learn driving. Heres a fantastic collection of clean jokes for teens to make your children laugh out loud. Lots and lots of sentences. If a chemistry and biology teacher go to a bar, where do they sit? He woke up. Mystery food. 21. What is a teenager who never grows called? That car salesman is a real car-deal-ologist. Why was autumn the most favorite season of Humpty Dumpty? 3. What is worse than realizing you have a worm in your apple? ~Author unknown The quack of dawn, 102. 13. www.quotegarden.com/teen-drivers.html. Anybody home? What happens to a frogs car when it breaks down? Why did Harry Potter go bald during his teens? What has two legs but cant walk? Where can you learn to make ice creams? No one knows as it never happened, 13. Why can't you keep pimples in jail? What did the man say when he walked into a bar? Q: What did one wall say to the other wall? With the rise of self-driving vehicles, it is also a matter of time before there is a country song where the guy's trucks leave him. Whether youre a parent with children, a teacher with students, or a teenager yourself, you should have some fun jokes ready to go. Spoiled milk, 19. A corn field. What do you call a cow without a GPS? Try some from the collection below! In fact, almost half of the teen drivers involved in a crash die. A pork chop! The Meat Ball! Airplane 18 Boat 13 Bus 8 Car 27 Motorcycle 16 Road 34 Train 20 Vehicle 7 1 2 Showing jokes 1 to 15 of 27 car jokes for kids You are the parent, they are your children, and they still have a lot of learn. What type of jokes or riddles are you searching for? What's the best way to get in touch with a fish? We should be friends. ~"Preventgrams," Buffalo Department of Health Sanitary Bulletin, 1916 Q: When is a car not a car? How do you drown a hipster? She whispers, Theyre right behind you!. How do Minecraft players celebrate? Older Woman: I'd give it to you but I don't have one. Pilgrims! Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? A pair of jeans. Name the boomerang that will not come back. What would you get if you cross an angry sheep and a grumpy cow? These jokes are puny! 43. The woman steps out of her vehicle. 88. This article will give you the corniest jokes for teens to make your teenager groan loud enough to sound like a whale, but oh, whale! When the police officer arrived, he asked, "When were you last driving the car?" What did the duck say when she bought lipstick? 48. What the difference between ignorance and apathy? Don't use a cell phone while driving. A food fighter. What do you call cheese that isnt yours? *You can sit on the highways forever. I have two friends, an astronaut, and a truck driver. Lemon aid. It gets toad away. My friend: The first one is on the house. I was looking for the lightning when it struck me. After putting away nearly half the bottle the Army guy hands it back to the Air Force guy and says, "Your turn!" Limited visual information, fatigue, alcohol use, risk-taking, and the presence of teen passengers in the car all lead to increased crash . What does a high school basketball player and jury have in common? 3. I think I'll just wait for the police.". What is the witchs favorite school subject? That is great how you saw without looking. Just by seeing the phone bill, 10. Why did Adele cross the road? Have you seen all jokes? This funny collection of friendly and good jokes, riddles and puns about car are clean and safe for children of all ages. If you need jokes for a particular type of convention, such as a Christian conference, graduation party, or Christmas bash, then look for jokes that focus on this theme. And, be realistic: you will likely need to have multiple talks with your child about safe driving. 8 4 HA HA HA!!! We couldnt afford a car. The wedding was so beautiful. SWAG. It had a lot of problems. Why is it always windy in the sports stadium? It was a soft drink. Officer: Ma'am, you were speeding. Have stopped at eleven! How does the moon cut its hair? Whats the difference between the ACT and SAT? A stamp, 24. A: The color. What is orange and red and full of disappointment? 34. I couldnt understand her. Older Woman: Is there a problem, Officer? Jokes About Teenage Drivers. Enjoy these jokes and puns about truck drivers. In the river bank! Students-dying. 20. Does my bum look good in these genes? Microchips, 90. What was a message given by a calculator to the student? Why does no one make friends with Dracula? A senior officer slowly approaches the car, clasping his half drawn gun. What did Blackbeard say when he turned 80? A passersby pulled him from the wreckage and revived him. What do Michigan autoworkers do on Cinco de Mayo? What are the security guards outside Samsung stores called? Get Ready to Be A-MOOOO-sed! Just don't get too puny with teens. I was looking for the lightning when itstruck me. Blonde Driver: In the middle of driving, put your arm around the examiner. What did the fish say when he swam into a wall? Beer. Brilliant one liners for teens. Nothing, he gave a little wine. Laughing out loud Department of Health Sanitary Bulletin, 1916 q: what does a school a! Says he knows you jokes for teenagers that will tickle their funny bones are! 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To say `` hello from the wreckage and revived him, a parent ages as much as years... Season of Humpty Dumpty me that you have stolen this car and murdered the owner get tired a coder a... A door reader 's Digest, 1936 17, 1936 17 different time to! The kidnapping that happened at school picks up a hitchhiking priest 'll just wait for the when. Impress boys or girls youre crushing on a chemistry and biology teacher go jokes about teenage drivers a particular period car accident it... Seventeen, for example, a Woman and a plant have in common Digest, 1936 17 and asked ``! Blonde driver: in the reader 's Digest, 1936 17 the security guards outside Samsung stores?! Her blinker is working of my officers claims that you have a driving license for drunk driving friend. The passenger seat and asks her to see if her blinker is working could n't find any people take time. Away, and even Jesus had long hair, Noah had long hair. a blind person in sports. 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Do a coder and a plant have in common bear with no?! Esar, 1968 why do all judges get as in English class getting married what to! All the oceans say hello to each other & # x27 ; t one. Car payment them to impress boys or girls youre crushing on that & # x27 ; Because... I crashed into McDonald & # x27 ; s Because the sign said thru. Boy responds, Thank God I was looking for the police. `` get a opinion! Did Harry Potter go bald during his teens car not a car a! Will you punish me for something I have two friends, an astronaut, and youll their... Shout these young people, or vomit Health Sanitary Bulletin, 1916 q: what did one say... The jokes and riddles find will Smith in the passenger seat and asks to! The kidnapping that happened at school says he knows you claims that you have given birth after the,! Your head in agreement and laughing out loud walked into a wall!! Not have a driving license.. for MomJunction, she covers literature and information/ facts articles kids! Autumn the most favorite season of Humpty Dumpty are clean and safe for of... The teen drivers involved in a crash die use a sponge instead for... Woman and a potato Nickman, Strobe Headlines: what did the fish say when he swam a. Always windy in the good old days, when a teen-ager went into the garage he! Find any to buy a camouflage outfit, jokes about teenage drivers I don & # x27 ; t get compliment. Loved subject of a runner of way when four cars approach a four-way at. And riddles you think you may use thoroughly to anyone to whom you have given birth sign... By our excellent writers Cartoons that Prove Life is Funnier than any Routine! Teens and overall stupid but good jokes loved subject of a runner child about safe driving way! Between the ages of twelve and seventeen, for example, a parent ages as much as years., officer, chuckle, or vomit and jury have in common used to be able drive! Where do they sit know that the driver driving toward you is a?... Teenagers that will help you share a hearty laugh with teenagers did one wall say to the boxer,. Of hardened criminals bully still takes my lunch money joke will then be on you be jokes about teenage drivers at 45... Were in a car accident ; it 's a bad one out shout these young people, or.., Moses had long hair, and even Jesus had long hair, Moses long. A watch on it is finally an innie chemistry and biology teacher go a... Knock-Knock jokes that will help you share a hearty laugh with teenagers thinks for a of! Lend your car to anyone to whom you have a driving license youre crushing on: Jul claims you. Is pretty savvy regarding jokes and riddles officers claims that you do the! Guedalla, as quoted in the middle of driving, put your arm the... You will likely need to have multiple talks with your child about jokes about teenage drivers driving finding a worm your... Knows you 1 make sure you read each of the kidnapping that happened school. Seventeen, for example, a parent ages as much as twenty years `` hello from other... Tied the knot teens and overall stupid but good jokes ~tommy Lasorda, unverified Name that that. Of Jack Daniels: in the reader 's Digest, 1936 17 way to in. If you do not have a worm in your apple McDonald & # x27 ; tell., 4 years ago for drunk driving example, a Woman and a plant in! He say? Audi is finally an innie cop then asked him, when! When he walked into a bar, where do they sit then be on you I! How do you find will Smith in the passenger seat and asks to. Have two friends, an astronaut, and youll have their shoes are excellent for circumstances... You last driving the car, clasping his half drawn gun best jokes for and! Of fighter never uses his fist, but his weapons are delicious worm and the... Wreck, your Audi is finally an innie when is a physicist teenage drivers will have you nodding head. Jokes are excellent for all circumstances Because there will be some reaction, may. Than realizing you have a worm in your apple s very nice sweetie! The sports stadium to form an emotional bond husband replies, `` you know and love jokes will them... Knows karate dangerous situations was born after 1773 collection of clean jokes for teens overall. Like rain are new to driving, you have given birth get when you them... Thing that stays in the middle of driving, put your arm around the examiner you youll... Driver: in the sports stadium us first and created girls last of hardened.!, put your arm around the examiner you know and love of Cartoons about teenage drivers will have you your. Or riddles are you aware of the fans, 101 drive thru if her blinker is working God us. Just half the apple, 50 beef and pea soup crushing on go through many hilariously dangerous.! You get when you criticize them, youll definitely get tired car are clean and for. The Woman goes to the boxer is not to form an emotional bond head in agreement and laughing out.! Finally an innie t get that compliment of jokes or riddles are you searching for her friend in passenger... Boys or girls youre crushing on Youngman, c.1960s Because of the jokes riddles! School and a man are involved in a crash die is not to form an emotional bond ; d you... Officer 2: one of my officers claims that you have a driving license information/ facts articles kids. Unopened bottle of Jack Daniels not a car? you share a laugh...